Would You Rather Be Right Or Happy?

Posted by Cory on Friday, October 9th, 2009 in Relationship Advice

Have you ever heard the question, “would you rather be right or happy?”

Many of us are known to be what I call “right fighters”. We are all guilty of it to some extent and it can serve you in certain areas of your life, but when it comes to marriage, all the experts agree that if you focus on fighting for your point to be right, you are likely sacrificing the happiness of your relationship.

There are a lot of words in our culture that have a negative connotation, but might not be as bad as we think. The word “wrong” is one of those words. It’s actually relative whether one is right or wrong and often comes down to opinion.

If you are used to fighting to be right when you are confronted by an argument with your spouse, my guess is that your relationship doesn’t have the intimacy level that is possible for us all.

Follow these key steps to be wrong gracefully and just sit back and observe as your relationship gets better and better!

1. You and Your Spouse Don’t Have to Agree About Everything

Understand that you and your spouse don’t have to agree about everything. It actually makes for a pretty boring relationship if you’re always agreeing. Difference of opinion adds a dynamic that not only helps you to learn more from a different perspective, but it gives you the opportunity to understand you partner better.

2. Use Reflective Listening When Arguing Points

Use reflective listening when arguing points. Many times when couples are having a disagreement, they are both arguing the same point, but get so caught up in being right, they don’t realize that they’re on the same page.

3. Stop the Fight Before it Gets Hostile

What about when it comes down to facts? Obviously, there is fact and opinion and when you’re in the heat of the “battle”, the two can get intertwined. If you know for a “fact” that 6th st comes before Wilshire, but your spouse insists that it doesn’t, be the hero and say something like, “you might be right” even if you know it’s not. Just being willing to make that small statement can stop the fight before it gets hostile.

Being wrong is not the end of the world and we are ALL wrong at some point. If you think of yourself as knowing more than your partner, you will come off as disrespectful and it WILL have a negative impact on your marriage.

Being humble and letting your partner influence you are two of the most important qualities to bring to the table if you want a successful and sustainable marriage. So, bite the bullet and be wrong, and do it gracefully!



If you've enjoyed reading this post then please subscribe to our Full Text RSS Feed.


Related Posts



Leave a Reply